I like to think that if my faith had lived, I’d probably be a preacher by now.
Okay, maybe not a preacher. But I think I’d at least be some kind of minister. Because writing, speaking, reaching for the heart… it’s in my blood.
I found a T-shirt the other day that I fell in love with. It’s from Queerly Beloved Tees, and man, I just couldn’t pass up the opportunity to step up my blasphemy game by actually wearing it, let alone stick a thorn in the day of a bigot or two.
But looking at it, there’s just something about it that makes me get all poetic. What exactly does it mean to an apostate, I am the image of God? And so I wrote something. I wrote on Instagram, and then I realized, this needs to live somewhere bigger.
I hope you’ll humor me. Nod along if you agree. And maybe buy a T-shirt too and come be blasphemous with me!
I don’t believe in God anymore. If you know me, it ain’t no secret: it’s been a long, long way since I did.
But this? This I do believe.
I believe that some of us are god, because we are healing from the idea of god. We are rebuilding what his followers took, reaching toward recovery, rediscovering the holy and wholly good that always was within us. We are the queer and faithless, the queer and figuring-shit-out, the queer and finding-a-way.
I believe that sometimes, god changes, moves, fades, dies. Sometimes god is not freedom. And sometimes power and joy and peace, it means dethroning god. It means reclaiming the place god once demanded in the depths of us. That we are powerful. We were good all along. We are god.
If that is blasphemy, it is a gorgeous, transformative, sacred blasphemy. It is a blasphemy that earns my amen.
And this, this I believe too.
I believe that some of us hold our god and our queerness side by side, abdicating neither, forfeiting neither, because each makes the other more sacred. More human. More true.
I believe that queer faith is not a betrayal, but a redemption. I believe that affirming faith is life-saving and courageous and honest.
I believe that if your queer faith is true to your soul, if it saves your life, then that too is sacred. And you have my one heart-full amen.
And one last thing, one last thing I believe.
I believe that if you hold god in your life, and you are not in support of queer people, you do good when you consider this:
That if we are made in the image of your god, then your god is made visible in us.
The image of your god in me, she is queer.
The image of your god in me, he is biracial.
The image of your god in me, they live in-between.
Your god is queer is bi is gay is ace is poly is pan is aromantic is labelless is figuring shit out. Your god is that which you turn away, who you judge, and what you call unnatural. God is everything and god is changing.
If we are made in the image of your god and you reject us, you are rejecting an image of god.
After all, even god loves rainbows.
And so I believe in those of us who look at god and see queer. I believe in those of us who look at the mirror and see god. I believe in those of us who are learning to love the god that is made visible in us.
You are queerly beloved. You are seen. And you, my dear, you are gonna be okay. 🌈